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  • Writer's pictureAnna Zaharyan

LOVE AND ACCEPT YOURSELF CHAPTER 2. WHY SELF-ESTEEM IS SO IMPORTANT


Self-esteem is important

Psychological studies show that about 80 - 85% of people don’t believe they are good enough or don’t measure up in some way, including their looks, performance, or relationships. 75% of people suffering with low self-esteem tend to have depression and anxiety, low achievement and poor social adjustment, become abusers or victims, or even commit suicide.

Psychologist Gilligan in his study of murderers concludes that low self-esteem is the most common reason for violence.

In the last 20 years the incidence of anorexia nervosa, an eating disorder that caused by a poor body image, has doubled, according to the research by National Association for self-esteem.

The source of the male and female low self-esteem differs. For most men it is linked to their ability to make money in comparison with others. Status, intelligence, strength, success, and competence are also factors for men to feel good about themselves.

For women it is important how others view them. They assume they have a poor body image because of some negative words from family or friends, or after watching weight loss advertisements that portray unnaturally thin women as the beauty role models.

People with low self-esteem especially struggle to find, build, and maintain healthy relationships. Meeting new people to find the right partner becomes too stressful, because they can’t express themselves and don’t believe they can be attractive and desirable. So they would rather lie and pretend to be someone else. Read more about WHY PEOPLE LIE ON DATING SITES on my other post.

Self-esteem helps us to cope with change and stress, take an action, and maintain healthy relationships. It’s a state of wellness in your body and mind, and the most important psychological need that affects your emotions, thoughts, values, actions, choices, and goals.

After your primary biological needs for life necessities, security needs, and a need for love and social belonging, a need to feel valued as a person becomes the most crucial requirement to live a satisfying life.

Feeling positive about yourself lets you control your own life. It control your reactions, attitude, ability to set and achieve your goals, and overall happiness.

People with low self-esteem experience personal insecurity, fear of change and rejection, fear to disappoint others and make a mistake, inability to trust people, relationship issues, and feeling of isolation.

They don’t feel worthy of the good things in life, no matter how much they accomplish, and can’t reward themselves for their achievements.

They find it difficult to let go of negative emotions and feelings such as guilt, anger, or fear, and often become victims of compulsive behaviors.

Read next LOVE AND ACCEPT YOURSELF. CHAPTER 3. HOW TO RECOGNIZE PEOPLE WITH LOW SELF-ESTEEM.

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